I Was Broken
by Today.Is.Life
Summary: Songfic. 'I was broken' by Marcus Foster. When Bella wakes up in the morning, alone as Edwards hunting, the memories haunt her. When she loses her temper with Edward, and explains of her anger, he understands. But just how does Bella apologise? BEDWARD!


**Hey guys! Another little one-shot! **

**I hope you like it :) **

**The song I used in this fic is called 'I Was Broken' written and sang by Marcus Foster. I highly recommend you listen to his version and Robert Pattinson's version on Youtube! I've fallen in love with them.**

**Hope you enjoy!**

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><p>It was little over a week since the big fight. It was little over a week since my kiss with my Jacob. It was little over a week since I'd made my choice. The right choice.<p>

But today when I woke up alone, as Edward was hunting with his brothers, memories flooded back of a few months ago.

When I was left, when I was alone, when I was heartbroken. When I'd wake in the morning to find nowhere there but the tears trickling down my face to remind me of my nightmare. Then I would travel to school, expecting to see his shiny Volvo parked in the lot. And I felt like dying right there on the spot when it wasn't.

I'd arrive home, after an excruciating day at school, clean, cook and do homework lifeless. Then I'd get ready for bed slowly, because I had no reason to rush to get to get into bed, because Edward wasn't there. Lastly, I'd fall asleep after crying and waiting for the nightmares to drown me.

And suddenly, I was angry. So angry I threw my Wuthering Heights book at the wall, and then my pillows, then my slippers and then anything I could reach.

I was lucky Charlie was at work, because with all the screeching and screaming I was doing, I'm sure it sounded like someone was being slowly murdered.

In my Edward-leaving-me fuelled rage, I hadn't noticed the window open and close and his beautiful figure approach me.

"Bella, sshh, calm down, love" he soothed softly, wrapping his arms around me.

For a while, I rested peacefully in his arms, crying soft tears, letting him kiss my head and whisper sweet nothings in my ear.

"Bella?" he asked cautiously, as I played with the buttons of his shirt.

I hummed in response.

"What's got you all worked up, love?"

I didn't want to tell him. I didn't want to tell him of the anger I still felt after he left me. But somewhere, in the strangest place of my mind, it was telling me to tell him.

Because Edward knew of the pain, knew of the nightmares, but he doesn't know how angry I was. How angry I am.

And if I was going to marry him, become his wife, which was my every intention because I loved him irrevocably and unconditionally and nothing would change that, I should tell him.

I should tell him the truth.

No lies, that's what we'd promised.

And, to me, it made sense to tell him of the anger. Maybe it would go away once I'd told him, because then Edward would know and we could move on from this.

In my mind, the words came out calmly, but in reality they came out the exact opposite. I stood from my seat in Edward's lap, and looked him square in the eyes. I could feel the anger rise in me, like the tide at night.

"Worked up? I'm not worked up I'm angry! I'm angry because when I woke this morning, I had flashbacks of when you was gone. When you left me" I spat, and somehow Edward was doing a real good job at hiding his emotions.

"You know of the pain, but you don't know of the anger. I'm so angry on how you could just pack up and leave as if I meant nothing. The pain has gone now, you fixed that and I'm grateful, but I can't contain my rage anymore.

"You left. Alice left. Esme left. Everyone left because you told them too! I never got a goodbye, never got to tell them that they'd always be in my heart, no matter how far away they were. But you stole me of that because you thought it was best for me! But you never understood that you and your family was best for me, because they were my family too. Yes Edward, you were best for me. You were and are and always will be the love of my life and you walked away with no emotion upon your face.

"I knew you shouldn't of left, that what happened at my birthday was an accident. And we both know Jasper was so upset about it he wouldn't have done it again! But even when you did leave, I thought I deserved a little compassion! You stared at me with cold eyes, and told me I was no good for you. I guess there was probably more in your eyes, but I didn't see it because I trusted you so much I trusted you when you said you didn't love me no more!

"Maybe I'm wrong to shout, maybe I'm wrong to be angry, but I thought you should at least know of the anger I felt. Maybe it'll go away now, I don't know, but somewhere deep inside of me, something told me this was the right thing to do. No matter how much it hurts us" I whispered the last few words, and wiped the tears that had been falling for all of my rant.

After minutes of silence, I plucked up the courage to look at Edward, and his eyes were what made more tears.

His beautiful, gold, warm eyes were filled with pain, sadness, anger of his own and regret. And instantly I felt guilty. "Edward I'm so sorry, I just-" I fell into a pool of guilt, and I tried to babble my apology but he stopped me with a sad smile.

"Don't apologise, I guess I deserved that. I always knew you were angry, just never knew how much", his voice was filled with hurt and anger at himself.

"I didn't mean to shout, it came out calm in my head, and I thought you should know cause I didn't want there to be any secrets between us when were about to get married", I said quietly, rubbing at my wet eyes.

"I understand. I guess I should give you some time alone, love", he moved to open the window and I whimpered.

Edward instantly was in front of me, cupping my cheeks with his hand, "I'm not leaving you. I promise. I-I just thought you might like some time alone".

I smiled softly, "That would be nice, thank you".

"Okay, I love you", he said as he crawled out of the window.

"I love you", I whispered back.

As soon as he was gone, I regretted everything I said to him, or at least the way I'd said it. I crawled up on my bed, and cried. I continued to cry for another hour until my eyes wouldn't cry no more.

But it had felt good to tell him everything. Because now we kept no secrets, we knew everything about one another. Everything was out in the open, was clear.

Everything could be perfect. But before perfect, I had some serious proper apologising to do.

I glanced at the clock, which annoyingly flashed 3:43pm.

So I took a long, hot, soothing shower, dried and then changed into some dark skinny jeans, a black tank top and a grey cardigan. I brushed my teeth and used a little perfume.

Drying my hair and brushing through it, I left it down around my shoulders as I searched for my black converses.

Finally ready, I wrote a note to Charlie telling him I'd be at the Cullen's, I grabbed my keys and hopped into my truck.

I had driven there so much, the route was etched in my mind forever, so I barely thought about driving as I trailed down the wet Forks road.

Trying to formulate a plan of apology, I gave up in a few minutes, because _nothing_ _ever_ goes according to plan.

Ten minutes later, I arrived at the Cullen's, though I made no move to get out of my truck. I leaned my head against the steering wheel and took a few needed deep breaths.

Feeling someone's gaze on me, I looked up and saw Carlisle, Esme and Alice staring at me through the front door, and Emmett, Jasper and Rosalie from the window.

Groaning again, I hit my head on the steering wheel purposefully.

I knew Edward wouldn't have said much about my rant, but when they have a certain little pixie in there family, they didn't need his input.

I'm sure I saw them laughing and smirking at me, as if they could tell by my face of how much sucking up I had to do.

If I didn't move now, I never would, so with one last deep breath I flung open my truck door and trudged towards the front door. Running back to slam the cab door shut.

Alice had already opened the front door and rushed to hug me, "Awh honey, I know the first real fight is always hard, but just remember how good you felt once you'd told him".

I mumbled "Stupid, physic pixie" into her shoulder.

Once Alice pulled away, and had dragged me inside, I looked at the whole family.

"Is he okay?" I whispered, though knowing they would hear me, as I wiped at my wetting eyes.

"Yes, he's fine my dear, just a little upset I guess", Esme soothed, giving me a little hug of her own.

I gulped and tried to swallow my tears, "Where is he?"

And then I heard the soft music float in from the music room, _perfect timing as always Edward._

Everyone gave me an encouraging smile before I forced myself to follow the music.

When I got to the room, Edward was sitting on the step, with a guitar in his hand. I knew he played the guitar, just not as often as his piano.

His back was to me, so I couldn't see his face and eyes, but Edward's slouched back told me that he was upset and sad.

Then he sang and voice was so beautiful, it knocked the breath out of me. I'd never heard him sing before, and he sang like an angel would.

I recognised the song, it was "I was broken" by Marcus Foster. Ironic, it fitted both of our situations.

I was broken because he left me, he was broken because he left me.

_"I was alone  
><em>_I was tired but now I'm bound  
><em>_My head is off the ground  
>For a long time I was so weary<br>Tired of the sound,  
>I've heard before<br>Knowing of the nights I'm out the door  
>Haunted by the things I've made<br>Stuck between the burning light and the dusty shade"._

His voice was so beautiful, and when I joined in the next verse with him, Edward was shocked, but he came and stood in front of me, staring at me.

Rosalie played the piano and Carlisle the guitar. The others stood and watched us sing to each other.

_"Said I used to think the past was dead and gone  
>But I was wrong, so wrong<br>Whatever makes you blind must make you strong, make you strong  
>In my time I've melted into many forms<br>From the day that I was born, I know that there is no place to hide  
>Stuck between the burning shade and the fading light".<em>

I sang with him in time, and the surprise and love in his voice was un-miss able. He'd never heard me sing.

Though his angelic voice was making my knees turn into jelly and my brain into mush.

In the chorus Edward's voice became stronger I met him at the same level. We were basically explaining how we were both broken to each other.

_"I was broken for a long time  
>But it's over now<br>Said I was broken for a long time  
>But it's over now<br>Yes and you,__yeah well you walk these lonely streets that people send, people send  
>There are some wounds that just can't mend<br>And I do pretend  
>Now I'm free from all the things that take my friends<br>And I will stand here till the end  
>Now I know I can take the moon<br>Stuck between the burning shade and the faded light I was broken for a long time  
>But it's over now, it's over now<br>Mm it's over now, now, now  
>It's over now, it's over now.<em>  
><em>It's over now, now".<em>

The tears were trailing down my cheeks, though I didn't stop singing, and when his hand slipped into mine, I felt the power to keep going.

And when Edward's voice went louder, I followed, working in harmony with him.

_"Said I was broken for a long time  
>But it's over, but it's over<br>But it's over, but it's over  
>But it's over, but it's over<br>But it's over now, now, now, now  
>But it's over, love is over<br>But it's over now  
>But it's over, love is over<br>But it's over now, now, now  
>I was broken for a long time now<br>But it's over, but it's over now yeah  
>Over now, it's all over, it's over now".<em>

And those last three lines was perfect for us, because we were broken, but when we found each other again in Volterra, we were fixed. Because nothing was missing, because we were each others other half.

And the brokenness was all over now, because the jigsaw puzzle was finally solved.

As Carlisle and Rosalie slowed down the music, until it was eventually gone, Edward and I threw our selves at each other and I held him so tight, I thought I was actually hurting him.

"I'm so sorry, I never meant to shout. I sorry, so sorry, I love you. I love you Edward" I babbled into his neck, as I tightened my legs around his waist.

"Sshh", he hushed softly, rocking us gently, "I know. I love you".

I searched his beautiful golden eyes, and I knew I'd been forgiven. "I never knew you could sing?" I asked him, kissing his neck.

"Ditto", he smirked, kissing my lips.

"Well", Emmett's voice broke our concentration on each other, "If that happens every time they argue, who's up for encouraging it?"

I couldn't help but agree, Edward's voice was heavenly.

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><p><strong>I hope you liked it. Please review and tell me what you think! I'd love to hear what you think!<strong>


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